I was having a discussion about the current state of male commentary; the consensus being lack of self reflection. That being said how does the process of reflection start when you’ve been conditioned to diminish and degrade yourself and your own? Some people naturally take steps that will cause them to grow inherently. Others are put in a sink or swim positions with varying outcomes, best case you grow and/or seek out guidance. But why isn’t that guidance readily available in the first place?
We are brought up expecting that a man is a protector, provider, stable and disciplined. These qualities are considered the bare minimum for a man, however, the character in which these qualities are displayed are often overlooked, leaving little to be desired in execution. Deep introspection is required to lead others to their highest potential. Feigning superiority, dominance and compassion is common but not hard to recognise when you’ve been through the ringer and come out on the other side, but why should you have to go through such levels of trauma? Why let disgraceful disposition be the main narrative?
The current social landscape is filled with impowered opinions, some are poorly formed but you’re shaped by your environment. Whether the person you were supposed to look up to wasn’t there or was abusive at what point does that become an excuse. The cards are more than likely stacked against you but do you have the awerness to do better. Men will say they don’t want their daughter(s) with a guy like them. When did that self awareness kick in and have you stopped being that guy? There’s been an increase of requests for traditional wives without understanding the responsibility or even the desire to be married. There’s also the unhinged desire to intentionally create broken homes for the sake of spreading their seed, which begs the question of your seeds quality.
These conversations stem from the inate desire to form companionship that most people naturally have. Whether it be familial, platonic or romantic most people enjoy company from time to time. You hear a lot of people say “how are you gonna love someone if you can’t love yourself ?”. That is a valid question but what is your idea of love for and from another person in the first place? You can take tests and read articles about love languages but is there meaning beyond the gestures if you haven’t reflected on the way you feel about and towards each love language? Have you even thought about what you want out of sharing another persons space? What makes you feel able to enter someone’s life with such an impact?
Most people grow up with the expectation of creating a family, but your upbringing may change your interpretations of what that entails. “It takes a village” is a true statement but traditionally it doesn’t replace the positions of mother and father. Can you still have a wonderfully fufilled or desperately underdeveloped life with both parents? Yes. Are some people truly meant to bring certain life into the world? Yes. Does that mean either way is better or worse? No. Relationships are give and take, some people are greedy and others naive. It’s safer to keep people at a distance with surface level attachment but depending on what you want in your life that won’t be fufiling.
One of the best lessons I learned from my dad is to meet people where they are. I took my time digesting that one but I’m better off for it. Take time to understand yourself and others, you don’t need a decade to understand where someone stands in your life. Some people aren’t meant to even be a season in your life nor are they meant to teach you anything other than what a red flag is. Hopefully we’ll see more conscience and feel good male commentary promoted, it’s better food for thought.
The Literature Of Men: A Think Piece
I was having a discussion about the current state of male commentary; the consensus being lack of self reflection. That being said how does the process of reflection start when you’ve been conditioned to diminish and degrade yourself and your own? Some people naturally take steps that will cause them to grow inherently. Others are put in a sink or swim positions with varying outcomes, best case you grow and/or seek out guidance. But why isn’t that guidance readily available in the first place?
We are brought up expecting that a man is a protector, provider, stable and disciplined. These qualities are considered the bare minimum for a man, however, the character in which these qualities are displayed are often overlooked, leaving little to be desired in execution. Deep introspection is required to lead others to their highest potential. Feigning superiority, dominance and compassion is common but not hard to recognise when you’ve been through the ringer and come out on the other side, but why should you have to go through such levels of trauma? Why let disgraceful disposition be the main narrative?
The current social landscape is filled with impowered opinions, some are poorly formed but you’re shaped by your environment. Whether the person you were supposed to look up to wasn’t there or was abusive at what point does that become an excuse. The cards are more than likely stacked against you but do you have the awerness to do better. Men will say they don’t want their daughter(s) with a guy like them. When did that self awareness kick in and have you stopped being that guy? There’s been an increase of requests for traditional wives without understanding the responsibility or even the desire to be married. There’s also the unhinged desire to intentionally create broken homes for the sake of spreading their seed, which begs the question of your seeds quality.
These conversations stem from the inate desire to form companionship that most people naturally have. Whether it be familial, platonic or romantic most people enjoy company from time to time. You hear a lot of people say “how are you gonna love someone if you can’t love yourself ?”. That is a valid question but what is your idea of love for and from another person in the first place? You can take tests and read articles about love languages but is there meaning beyond the gestures if you haven’t reflected on the way you feel about and towards each love language? Have you even thought about what you want out of sharing another persons space? What makes you feel able to enter someone’s life with such an impact?
Most people grow up with the expectation of creating a family, but your upbringing may change your interpretations of what that entails. “It takes a village” is a true statement but traditionally it doesn’t replace the positions of mother and father. Can you still have a wonderfully fufilled or desperately underdeveloped life with both parents? Yes. Are some people truly meant to bring certain life into the world? Yes. Does that mean either way is better or worse? No. Relationships are give and take, some people are greedy and others naive. It’s safer to keep people at a distance with surface level attachment but depending on what you want in your life that won’t be fufiling.
One of the best lessons I learned from my dad is to meet people where they are. I took my time digesting that one but I’m better off for it. Take time to understand yourself and others, you don’t need a decade to understand where someone stands in your life. Some people aren’t meant to even be a season in your life nor are they meant to teach you anything other than what a red flag is. Hopefully we’ll see more conscience and feel good male commentary promoted, it’s better food for thought.